Another one found its way to my inbox today: the second in two days and the third in three weeks. Seems that the world and his or her significant other are pregnant, and are then scanning their own foetal scan images before firing up Outlook to prove it. Maybe I should email back grainy photos of my three, saying "but look what happens in a few years time!" Talk of all these new lives led wifey to say that she felt like the odd one out; I laughed nervously.

Next door to the baker's where I can sometimes be found buying a granary baguette and a Belgian bun (hold the nuts) used to be a hardware-cum-video-rental shop. This disappeared a month or so ago to be replaced by another business very much of its time: nope, not a tanning shop. New place appears to offer 3D scans of your unborn Oscar winner / world leader / BK employee of the month - delete as appropriate. Perhaps they bought up the old stock and invented a SupraScanomatic, like Wallace.