Good old Kev. Old, old Kev. Yes, it's true that he somewhat dropped the ball in relation to Jack's. That's no more than water under the pier, dear boy. In a flagrant attempt to redeem himself, he's alerted us to a former Felixstowe favourite rising like the Phoenix game into which I plugged a hatful of 10p pieces. That was on the pier: you remember?

Scenic Picasa route takes us past the newly demolished Ordnance hotel, about to be reconstructed as a Premier Inn. Nifty spot outside the ever-reliable Alex and up paved Bent Hill. Inhaler, please. Here at the pinnacle is Ruby Ruby Ruby Ruby's, back after a spell, says Kev, as a Polish place. Can it really be six years since our previous visit? The heck, it does flip. Sadly, no Grenvyle to join us this time but he's on our thoughts with a smile as we Sopot the prawns on the menu. Balcony off limits today, thankfully: we'll join the others in the well-windowed and festively adorned conservatory bit.

Boards offer Lodz of options such as lamb shank, BBQ ribs and roast of the day. Andy goes out a limb and orders the "zurek", a sour rye soup with bacon and hard-boiled egg, thereby impressing the chatty waitress who says he'll either Lublin or hate it. Me and Kev hunter's chicken out and go with the cheese & chutney sandwich, the biggest Desperate Dan doorsteps you ever Warsaw, and the brunch, i.e. a generous "small" breakfast and chips. All freshly cooked to order, and proper HP sachet: tick-tick. Eco-Andy slurps and sups his salty soup and survives. Ingenious move, I think, to offer your traditional light lunch choices alongside lower Silesian specialities. Seems to work for the punters sharing the room with us.

Somehow, Andy's saved space for an entire sticky toffee pudding in custard. That looks good, as does the entire selection of Katowice cakes on the counter. Smiling lady serves me a slab of cherry and choc, and we then discover that for some reason -- Black Friday? -- all drinks are on the house, ensuring that our lattes are all the sweeter. Still gleams, does Ruby's: be sure to take your Poznan.

If it was a car -- Smyk.
If they were passing by -- Ricky Wilson.