The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.

Groan

We whisked up huge bowls of strawberry, banana and butterscotch. You could hear those trestle tables groan with Angel Delight. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 18, 2015

Beer

Amy invited some drinkers, big guys, to her dance studio. Taught them the positions. Put on a show that she called a beer ballet. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 17, 2015

Ignite

Taped to the rocket, his moulded head didn't flinch. It was only when I shouted "Ignite!" that I saw his eagle eyes swivel. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 16, 2015

Plate

Chatting away, I swear I saw something crawl into my side salad. People stared as my plate went spinning. Nobody else had seen it. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 15, 2015

More to follow.

The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.

Mint

P O L O P O L E M O L E M I L E M I N E M I N T @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 11, 2015

Cobweb

Shed-bound, Pete takes the cobweb full in the face, trips and hits the patio. Which is when he feels something crawl into his ear. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 9, 2015

Zero

Thought he was something. He was nothing. Less than zero. Zoe, maths nerd, coughed. Where exactly is this guy on the number line? @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 8, 2015

More to follow.

Poor Natalie. It's my fault. It's all my fault. Being a home game, I had to book in the opposition players since, as the handbook proclaims, no pass, no entry. I never even thought about the need to book in Natalie, who's not played a game for us since week 1. Those chaps at the gatehouse let her on to the site, grudgingly, but insisted that she couldn't stay despite much pleading from both her dad and me. Their hands were tied, apparently. All very poor. So off she went in the car with her dad without playing a game. What a waste.

Which left the two of us, me and Steve, to entertain the birdmen known as the Petrels comprising spinny Peter (previously) with lefty apostles Paul and John. They're riding high and pushing for a Champions League spot so it was always going to be a tough enough night, even without Natalie (still my fault). Anyway:

• first blood to Ed, thrashing Peter 11-1 in the first end before losing out in an epic and fun five-ender
• thankfully Ed bounced back to secure victory over both lefties
• not Steve's night, thrashed 11-0 in his opening end against Paul and failing to win an end all evening, frustratingly

Choosing your doubles team becomes relatively straightforward with only two of you in the team. Step forward Ed and Steve to win the first two ends, lost the next two ends but come good in the fifth for a valuable point. Time for a pre-Christmas drink at the Black Tiles before calling time on the first half of the season.

The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.

Total

Twelve prime ministers, five Oscar winners and two presidents stayed in those rooms. Now three bulldozers would total The Grand. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 5, 2015

Reason

With his scratchcard win, Kevin purchased a luxury mini submarine. I've always wanted one, he said, for some unfathomable reason. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 4, 2015

Care

Tomorrow's one of her fast days on that 5:2 thingy. Takes real willpower. Guess I'll sneak her advent chocolate. Because I care. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 3, 2015

Frost

Rimmer learned from the greats. Eventually, he landed an interview with the president. You could hear the Frost in Rimmer's voice. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 2, 2015

Pale

Taped under the bin was the 7th challenge. "Eat a whole KFC Family Bucket in 5 minutes." That, I said to Lisa, is beyond the pale. @130story

— Ed Broom (@edbroom) December 1, 2015

More to follow.

Past Wyevale and Grange Barn the Zoe goes zooming
We're licking our lips at the lunch that is looming
See a shop, park outside and cue seatbelt unlocking
That satnav worked wonders to pinpoint Ashbocking

The barn (a brick building) is less than appealing
Yet inside elicits a Christmassy feeling
With baubles and glitter, this cafe's a-rocking
Seems others have also discovered Ashbocking

Yum for my sarnie with cranberry and turkey
While Kev's pumpkin soup and cheese scone is quite quirky
Andy orders off-menu attracting some mocking
For bacon and mushrooms on toast in Ashbocking

I briefly popped out, felt the need to observe
Their wall -- crinkle crankle -- with curve after curve
No piers and less bricks, the idea is shocking
Come visit and view the weird wall at Ashbocking

Numerous cakes, hard to know where to start
Coffee sponge, lemon drizzle and moist mincemeat tart
With top grub and good coffee, the punters are flocking
To the Crockery Barn down in central Ashbocking

• website -- Crockery Barn Cafe

If it was a car -- Holden Hurricane.
If they were passing by -- Matthew Wilcock.