Chapter 19 of the non-bestselling Crinkle-Crankle Crew mentions Hollesley (aka The Colony) and some former notable inmates such as Brendan Behan, Jeffrey Archer and Andy Coulson. Prior to this visit, I suspect the closest I'd been to HM Prison Hollesley Bay was, of course, to visit a couple of serpentine walls, exhibits 1 and 2. Or possible a visit way back in 2012 to the nearby Suffolk Punch Trust which I'm told is currently closed.

In the glory days of Light Lunches there was often talk of visiting the prison. There's a caff? Yep, said Andy, and not one but two. Finally, then, in our Third Age, time to go all Norman Stanley Fletcher. Bike to station, train to Melton (MES), bike to Boyton on that l-o-n-g Going Straight stretch or road. Much needed WC2026 hydration break chez Andy and his GLW then off we go, him on his Nordic poles leading the way to Boyton Marshes, an "example of coastal grazing marshland". Hey, we're on the King Charles III England Coastal Path. Here be locations for The Dig, esp. that scene with Lily James and Johnny Flynn. Whereupon we briefly meet an older guy walking the other way, proudly shirtless.

Boyton Boy, who's doing this walk with someone who's not done it before, tells me we're heading for a distant treeline. He does this several times on our approximate four-mile stroll before we at last see signage for Marsh Barn Coffee Shop. With its giveaway tagline of "brewing new beginnings", the caff is run by some of the prison's Category D guests, that category meaning low risk of escape or harm to the public. And the service? Is absolutely all smiles and extremely polite, in the same way that the prices are extremely cheap. Sandwich and crisps and a can? £4, please. Where did you last see a jacket potato for £2.50? Greatly enjoyed my egg mayo and Piper's and Pepsi Max parked on a picnic bench round the back with Mr and Mrs Andy.

Given its out-of-the-wayness, I thought we'd be among the few people here, but not so. Very popular with the walkers and the twitchers, apparently. Also on offer are some fresh vegetable boxes and a selection of clothes, as a bonus. Veg, nice, obviously, but not as instantly pleasing as the carrot cake and chocolate cake that we split between us. Half-decent cuppa coffee, too. Coming away, I took a photo of the price list. Want to take one of me? said one of the hench T-shirted lads working in the cafe. What would you do?

If it was a car -- Ford Sierra RS Cosworth.
If they were passing by -- Sid Owen.