EDitorial ± 2-Jun-2010

Bouncy Bouncy

Like all right-thinking parents, and as can most likely be proved by the judicious use of Google Earth, we are the proud owners of a big blue bear. Did I say bear? Came out all wrong. I meant trampoline.

Bouncy bouncy
Ooh such a good time
Bouncy bouncy
Shoes all in a line
— Mighty Boosh

Thanks to the recent half-decent (rhyme every time) weather, me and The Boy have conspired to create a new game -- let's call it Goalies. He climbs aboard SS Elastica while I stay on the terra firma that is the patio, painstakingly laid by pipesmoker of the year Uncle Philip many moons ago. I chip up the ball in his direction and The Boy has to save it. Straightforwards, like what the meerkat says.

  • if he catches it or stops it, great
  • if my shot was totally rubbs, I retrieve the ball from the nettle pit or a nearby prickly bush
  • if he lets a good one past him, he has to fetch it, requiring the use of his Mum's crocs, which can be way too much effort, hence his often filthy socks

OK, it's not got the playability of Ticket To Ride nor the thrill of Rollerball nor the strategy of mancala, but it'll suffice. Fresh air and helps our tea go down. Everyone's a winner.

One essential item is the ball. We were using our favourite car-boot ball until an errant kick from Sonny Jim sent it flying over the fence. Goes to either side, we have the power to fetch it. Goes over the end and that's a whole different street. It ain't coming back.

Stocking up on some essential gelatelli and weird mallow cakes from Lidl last week, they had a selection of super bouncy balls, only £1.99 each. I'll take the retina-threatening SpongeBob model. Home, I hand the ball to The Boy 'cos I'm off to the Film Theatre again. Two hours later I'm re-shed-ing the bike and there's zero sign of Mr SquarePants. Inside, I find out that he unleashed another dodgy kick and over the end it flew. Assuming 20 minutes play, which is generous, that's cost me £6 an hour. That's that.

Me and him undertook an emergency outing to Lidl at the weekend, returning with (a) Toy Story and (b) Cars balls. Had a good session with Buzz and Woody yesterday. In from work tonight and he says "Dad, have you seen the Toy Story ball? I can't find it. But SpongeBob has come back."