EDitorial ± 26-Oct-2014
130Story: Being / Mill / Launch / Lame / Text
The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.
Being
Me to cook, pre-gig. Phil Oakey wanted chilli. Running late: mince was frozen, no tin opener and that rice is still being boiled. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 25, 2014
Mill
You're the temp? Welcome to Saddlestone. Say hi to Hayley, Mick and Heather. Glenn's off today. And your name is...Spike? Perfect! @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 24, 2014
Launch
At the launch pad
Sigourney & Brad
See Branson proclaim
The spaceship's new name
Sigourney gasps: Oh no
They've called it Nostromo
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 24, 2014
Lame
Look, she said, we're going. Everyone loves Elvis. Go in your work clothes. If anyone asks, tell them you're wearing a lame suit. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 21, 2014
Text
"Syllabus change, guys. New set text is now up." We stared at the board: "Brilliant speech. Cried twice." Going to be a long term. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 20, 2014
EDitorial ± 21-Oct-2014
TT1415, Week 5
Team was Ed, Yang and Steve. Yang pulled out on Monday lunchtime. Ed mailed Alison. Alison was playing for her own team. Ed phoned Bob to cancel match. Bob none too happy. Alison mailed Ed. Her game had been cancelled. She was free to play. Ed phoned Bob to reinstigate match. Bob happy.
So that's Alison, currently underperforming member of the newly formed BT Thunderbirds, joining Ed and Steve for another Rosary game. True blue last week, mellow yellow this week. Here's biker Bob, attending as a spectator only, to watch his teammates tricky Tony, tablethumping Dave and thwacking Clive (previously). In brief:
- good 1/3 for Steve, doing well to beat Clive 3-1 but edged out by Dave
- handy 1/3 for Alison, digging in to secure victory against Clive 11-9 in the fifth and final end
- satisfactory 2/3 for Ed, beating both Clive and awkward Dave after going into a fifth end against Tony, being 5-0 up at the change then losing 11-6
Singles done and 4-5 down to the yellers. Step forward Ed and Steve to play some half-decent shots, Steve landing a couple of fine smashes, to grab that extra point and thereby obtain the draw. Good evening's work.
EDitorial ± 19-Oct-2014
130Story: Meter / Branch / Input / Car / Bitter
The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.
Meter
Read your meter, sir? He sat down and pored through my most recent blank verse. Woeful, sir. I hereby revoke your poetic licence. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 18, 2014
Branch
Since we merged with that other oak, we're seeing far fewer of our feathered friends. I'm afraid branch closures are unavoidable. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 17, 2014
Input
10 CLS
20 PRINT "Please enter your name"
30 INPUT N$
40 PRINT "I am afraid, ";N$
50 PRINT N$;", my mind is going"
60 END
RUN
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 16, 2014
Car
- That damp patch won't go away.
- Oh?
- Yeah. Weird thing is, it's the exact shape of Harry Potter's scar.
- Like a Ford Anglia?
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 14, 2014
Bitter
Awful, said the Star. Eddie and Cillian told me to forget about it. Keep smiling, kid. So I did. Like the Murphys, I'm not bitter. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 13, 2014
EDitorial ± 15-Oct-2014
TT1415, Week 4
Mild and not remotely bitter out there as the male members of Defiants race down to the Rosary Con Club. Steve wins in the Crimson Haybaler, Ed's second in the Turbo Terrific while Yang brings up the rear in the Buzzwagon. He-he-he.
Had expected to see the likes of John and Colin tonight on the dance hall floor. Neither's available, so joining Oz Pink Floyd Adrian (previously) are two new faces, good boy Matt and oh Phil Phil, both fresh in from Colchester. In brief:
- disappointing duck for Yang, never really at the races
- frustrating nought for Steve, unable to cross the line when it mattered
- pleasing 3/3 for Ed, outspinning and sweating his way past everyone
More of the coulda should in the doubles with Ed and Steve, eventually losing out to the Essex twosome shortly before 11pm. That'll be our third 7-3 defeat of the season. Drat and double drat.
EDitorial ± 13-Oct-2014
Live From the Foundation
(my winning entry in the Micro Bookends 1.01 weekly competition having the first word "FIRST", the last word "BORN" and based on that microphone photo, and as published on the Micro Bookends website)
First, a big hand for the caterers. What about those meatballs?!
My name’s Bob Hope. I’m no stranger to academy awards though I was a little surprised at your invitation. I guess these occasions can become a bore. Am I right, Niels?
I flew over today with Mr Oppenheimer there. That Enola Gay is so noisy, Bobby thinks he’s become deaf!
At the airport, I saw Werner Heisenberg. I think it was him. I can’t be certain.
On the road to Stockholm – tack – we broke down. Two hours we waited. Now I’m surrounded by mechanics!
Anyway, the winner of the 1954 Nobel Prize in Physics is… drum roll… Max Born!
EDitorial ± 12-Oct-2014
130Story: Bee / Brief / Delight / Prompt / Bow
The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.
Bee
Order Hymenoptera
Has insects none too popular
Most ants are pants, those wasps are brutes
Us bees got knees and tiny boots
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 11, 2014
Brief
"Brief. Brief in the air." A brave decision by Miss Duncan, head of music, to lead the school band through an entire Floyd album. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 10, 2014
Delight
Patio Breakfast
Spellbound By Sunny Delight
Awfully Orange
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 8, 2014
Prompt
You think he's alright? Should we ring the local hospitals? Come 1:30, he's there. Not today. He's normally so, er, well, prompt. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 7, 2014
Bow
The Gunslinger live in London, about '63. Great show. I missed the last train. He paid for a room. Forget it, he said. Bo's treat. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 7, 2014
EDitorial ± 10-Oct-2014
Coffeelink Roastery
Not only does Kev know people, but he knows people who know people. Which is
how team Light Lunch -- me, Andy and that Kev -- find ourselves at a
top secret location on a small industrial estate in West Ipswich.
It's 1pm and the door is open. Let the tour begin.
Meeting and greeting us is Azzouz, local caffeine kingpin and Mr Coffeelink. While he has highly recommended cafes on both the waterfront and the station, plus numerous others around East Anglia, the magic starts here in this anonymous unit. That whacking great gizmo in the rear is what we've come to see. If I'm not mistaken, that's a Toper roaster from their TKM-SX series. It's a beast.
Operating the Toper like a boss is Hakim. Green beans go in, the roasting process kicks off -- listen to those popcorn sounds -- and darkly coloured beans emerge. To quote an old advert: Oh, the smell of it! Azzouz patiently explains about single origins, arabica v. robusta, levels of bitterness, etc. But never mind the science: what does it taste like?
Fortunately Azzouz has a more domestic looking silver coffee machine on hand. He grinds a handful of beans, tamps them down and presses the button. What emerges is a fantastic looking double espresso with an impressive crema, the cloudy bit on top. All three of us sip carefully. Ah. Zing! That's a damn fine jolt right there. Agent Cooper would be mighty proud. Another, offers Azzouz? Why not, we say. We're all zinging for the rest of the afternoon and well into the evening.
Big thanks to Azzouz, Hakim and PatTheChat for being so hospitable. Give their website a vist.
EDitorial ± 7-Oct-2014
TT1415, Week 3
Only week three and Ed's sitting this one out. Poor fella needs a sit-down what with his 83% record thus far. Well, that's one way of looking at it. Defiants strict rotation system means that not everyone plays all the time, hence Steve and Yang are joined by that young whippersnapper Natalie (now injury free) for the first time.
Britannia thunderdome acts as the venue encore une fois, being home to the preying Buzzards comprising the older and younger Brians and laugh-a-minute net-bothering Peter (previously). You'd imagine it would be tight. In brief:
- back on form 2/3 for Yang but losing in three tight games to Brian J
- back on form 2/3 for Steve but losing in three tight games to Brian J
- fab 3/3 for in-form Natalie, undoubted star of the night, who was 9-0 up on Peter in the final end before beating him 11-2
Doubles went all the way. Sadly, that was the wrong way. House points to everyone concerned for an impressive 7-3 victory.
EDitorial ± 5-Oct-2014
130Story: Pain / Click / Mercury / Long / Blink
The rules of 130Story are simple: given a random seed word, write a story in 130 characters.
Pain
Python Planet? What a pain. Eric wants the Heston role and Gilliam as director. Michael has to be the surgeon. No Palin, no Galen!
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 4, 2014
Click
My gears were shot
They slipped a lot
Frustrating to predict
At Halfords, Jane
Fine-tuned my chain
And suddenly we clicked
@130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 3, 2014
Mercury
Blood test results are in, Britney. Hydrargyria aka mercury poisoning. Steer clear of heavy metal. Don't you know that it's toxic? @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 1, 2014
Long
Bay 42 contains a green camper van. That's where Pete lives. Location, location, location, says Pete. After all, it is long stay. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) October 1, 2014
Blink
Got a printer from iProvidence Inc. Couldn't stop it putting a Horus watermark on each sheet. Sent it back. Clearly on the blink. @130story
— Ed Broom (@edbroom) September 30, 2014
EDitorial ± 3-Oct-2014
Light Lunches: Waterfront Cafe, Bramford
There's mild peak oil anxiety as we set off. Last week's electric car (clap clap: thank you, TMBG) had a petrol back-up. Today's jetpack, the shrunken Peugeot iOn, has no such safety net and we'll be out of juice in less than fifty miles. Best we keep our iOn (SWIDT?) the remaining range. Andy demonstrates that turning on the air con stroke radio automatically cuts our estimated mileage. Kev and me, self-professed film buffs, both visualise Apollo 13. Four more amps...
Over the bridge and and swing left by the Premier Inn, following the brown signs, on to the B1113. We can see the sea! OK, not actually the ocean but to our left is the Suffolk Water Park. No good for water skiers 'cos it's so flat around here. Another left on an Emin unmade road and lo, 'tis the Waterfront Cafe. That's what the big white letters say though their website insists this is the Waterside Cafe. Andy parks the Peugeot facing the great lake, an aquatic vista not quite up there with the likes of the View Point Cafe.
As per The Bistro, there's far more folk than expected (although no sign of Ma and Pa who reviewed this spot a while back) with a small queue nearly out of the door. Big specials board offers homemade pies, chicken curry, lasagne & chips (classy), all around the sick squid mark. Kev orders his grub before realising he is, like Her Maj, devoid of cash. Luckily he's with friends, all of whom go for a properly classy can of San Pellegrino from a fridge full of less familiar soft drinks. Lots of smoker-friendly outdoor seating but we'll take that corner table, ta muchly.
'Cos I've paid, me and Kev's orders are on the 71 ticket. Andy's on 72. Guess who gets his double egg, ham and chips first? Right. 73 comes and goes before it's our turn. Kev's cod is super fresh and Andy's nearly but not quite defeated by his massive plateful. I've got the much lighter hits-the-spot one-of-each breakfast bap. Tick in the box for Heinz ketchup.
Second week running and out of time for dessert. No! Did I spy a Tunnocks product or two up there? Bye to the very friendly team who run the WC. There's no frills here — this sure ain't no Woodbridge Waterfront — but you'll be well fed for a decent price.
- website -- Waterfront Cafe, Suffolk Waterpark
If it was a car -- Gibbs Aquada.
If they were passing by -- Dean Macey.